If you are like most people, you’ve already made (and broken) a few resolutions for the new year. We all promise ourselves that we’ll do something differently in the coming 12 months. The conventional list typically cites trite promises like go to gym, eat healthy, quit smoking and so forth. These promises are empty by design, intended only to fill the gaps between sentences, and are hardly ever taken literally.
This year, skip the act and replace the boring list with a single promise: sexual self love!
About self-esteem and your sexuality
At its core, self-esteem is about liking yourself. Do you wake up each day and love being you? Do you support you? It’s also about building self-confidence, having some level of achievement in one’s life and holding the respect of others. Most of us have some kind of awareness that when we feel sexually powerful, that confidence shows up in many ways.
Confidence is universally considered sexy. People who feel they are good at sex have a sense of self-confidence. If you can consciously nourish your sexual energy, it will improve your own self-assurance and use that energy as fuel to live your life the way you want to live it.
Your sexuality gives you all the answers about yourself. The way in which you are able to admit your own sexual desires and habits, says everything about where you are in life. Do you dare to be yourself? Do you dare to say what you feel? Do you dare to say what you want the most?
Take inventory
We all have a sense of our sexual identity, but do we ever stop to consider it? Take a mental inventory every now and then. Write a list of sexual things you’ve experienced, or wanted, but never asked for. Familiarise yourself with your sexuality, refresh your memory on the things you’ve truly enjoyed or think you might enjoy, then revisit it often to keep the memories crisp. We must know who we are in order to know what we want. Everything is connected.
Body image
Society today places a lot of value on appearance, and since we all want to belong, it becomes increasingly difficult to not be obsessive about how we look. The more content we are within ourselves, the more we are free to love our bodies as they are.
Reprogram your internal dialogue to not allow that self-deprecating voice to get airtime. Tune in so you can turn it off! Chuck the Cosmo with its perfectly Photoshopped bodies in the bin. We are all special and unique and we need to treat ourselves with respect at all times. There is no need for you to compete with anyone – you are enough!
Commit to spoil yourself
Taking the time to enjoy your own sexuality, privately and just for yourself, is the perfect way to better understand your sexual identity. We’re talking about something more grounded, like treating yourself to a new lingerie set on pay day and spending a night in with your phone turned OFF and your favourite sensual toy ON. Learn to detonate your own O-bomb, it will make you love yourself that much more.
Wishing you a happy, sensual and sexually fulfilling 2016. Until next time.
